Rudies Uber Dallas: Selecter under heavy manners in the Deep South

IT TAKES a while for it to sink it that it's all for real. The sheer breath-taking size of the place, the drawls and y'alls, the ten gallon titfers, Baptist fire and brimstone on breakfast TV, battalions of bronzed blondes who just lurv letting it go to their heads, and that big yellow sun that looks like it's just come unstuck from a Cornflake packet. Yup, it's pow'ful hot in Texas, boy. Pow'ful confusing too...