Christopher Milk: Some People Will Drink Anything (Warner Brothers)

THE RUMOR you may have heard about all rock critics secretly wanting to be rock and roll stars is absolutely true. They won't all admit it, but I've yet to meet one who hasn't made the fact perfectly clear in one way or another. One noted critic of my acquaintance (who, out of deference to my spot on the reviews roster shall remain nameless) delights, while reeling under the effect of any type of unlikely alcoholic mix you'd care to imagine, in nothing so much as singing through his entire repertoire of self-penned rock songs at the top of his lungs in a voice matched for beauty only by the sounds of a medieval peasant having his eyes gouged out.