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Album of the Year: Never mind Talvin Singh, here's the bollocks...

Toby Manning, Jockey Slut, December 1999

High above central London, Jockey Slut assembled an illustrious panel to debate, Mercury Prize-style, the album of the year in the plush environs of Home's vip bar. With so many zingers to choose from, a ruthless process of elimination was employed to whittle ten records down to a single victor. Our assembled artists, DJs, and record company execs pushed their cases with needle point-precision, upsetting chums, sacrificing sacred cows, and threatening to knock heads together in the process. The only thing they did agree on — thankfully for us — was that all-important champion.

Total word count of piece: 4055

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